Sinai Strategies Suggests: Fake It Till You Make It? Why Not Just Be You?

We’ve all heard the advice: “fake it till you make it.” It rolls off the tongue with the confidence of conventional wisdom, promising that pretending to be something we’re not will eventually transform us into that very thing. But here’s a radical question worth considering: Why fake it at all? Why not simply be you?

The Origins of “Faking It”
The phrase “fake it till you make it” first appeared in written records around 1973, though its cultural DNA traces back to Paul Simon’s 1968 lyrics in “Fakin’ It”: “And I know I’m fakin’ it, I’m not really makin’ it.” The sentiment struck a chord because it captured something universal about the human experience—the gap between who we are and who we think we should be.
The concept itself has ancient philosophical roots. Aristotle suggested that to become virtuous, one must first act virtuously. Throughout history, various thinkers have endorsed the idea of “acting the part” until you embody it naturally. But somewhere along the way, this nuanced philosophical insight got distilled into a catchy phrase that may be doing more harm than good.

The Case for Authenticity
Oscar Wilde offered a different perspective: “Be yourself; everyone else is taken.” This isn’t just clever wordplay—it’s a fundamental truth about human uniqueness and potential. Jewish wisdom provides particularly rich insights into why authenticity isn’t just preferable but essential.
The Talmud teaches in Berakhot 17a that “Better is one hour of repentance and good deeds in this world than the whole life of the world to come”—emphasizing authentic action over performative behavior. This isn’t about rejecting growth or improvement; it’s about ensuring that growth comes from a place of truth rather than pretense.
Pirkei Avot poses three essential questions: “If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, what am I? And if not now, when?” These questions strike at the heart of authentic living—advocating for yourself while serving something greater, and doing both with urgency and presence.
Perhaps most powerfully, the Baal Shem Tov taught that every soul has a unique mission that only they can fulfill. This makes authenticity not merely a personal preference but a cosmic necessity. Your particular combination of talents, experiences, and perspectives isn’t accidental—it’s purposeful.

The Hidden Costs of Faking It
When we choose to fake it, we often achieve short-term wins at the expense of long-term fulfillment. Consider the job interview where you present a version of yourself that impresses the panel but doesn’t reflect who you actually are. You might land the position, earn a good salary, and check all the external boxes of success. But you’ll likely spend your days feeling like a fraud, constantly worried about being discovered, and increasingly disconnected from work that could genuinely energize you.
This disconnect breeds what psychologists call imposter syndrome—a psychological experience characterized by persistent self-doubt and the inability to internalize one’s accomplishments, despite clear evidence of competence. People experiencing imposter syndrome feel like frauds, regardless of their actual achievements, and live in constant fear that others will discover their perceived inadequacy.
The symptoms are telling:
• Self-doubt that questions genuine skills and abilities
• Fear of exposure as someone who doesn’t belong
• Denial of success by attributing achievements to luck rather than merit
• Comparison to others that always leaves you feeling inadequate
• Perfectionism that sets impossible standards
• Anxiety and stress from the constant internal tension

The Alternative Path
What if instead of faking it till you make it, you committed to being authentically you while you grow into who you’re becoming? This isn’t about settling for mediocrity or refusing to stretch beyond your comfort zone. It’s about building from your genuine foundation rather than constructing an elaborate facade.
When you pursue roles, relationships, and opportunities that align with your authentic self, several things happen:
You attract situations that actually fit you.
You perform better because you’re working from your natural strengths.
You experience less stress because you’re not maintaining a false persona.
And perhaps most importantly, you contribute something unique to the world—something that only you, being genuinely you, can offer.

Healing Yourself to Heal the World
Jewish wisdom suggests that if you want to heal the world, you must first heal yourself. But healing requires honesty—a clear-eyed assessment of who you are, what you value, and where you’re meant to contribute. This isn’t selfish self-absorption; it’s the necessary foundation for meaningful service.
When we fake our way through life, we rob both ourselves and the world of our authentic contribution. We end up in the wrong jobs, wrong relationships, and wrong situations, wondering why success feels hollow and why we’re always tired from maintaining our act.

The Courage to Be Real
Perhaps the most radical act in our image-obsessed, performance-driven culture is simply being yourself. Not the polished version. Not the version you think others want to see. Not the version that fits the mold. Just you—with your particular combination of strengths and struggles, insights and blind spots, dreams and fears.
This doesn’t mean being static or refusing to grow. It means growing from your authentic center rather than trying to become someone else entirely. It means having the courage to show up as you are while remaining open to who you’re becoming.
The next time you hear someone advise you to “fake it till you make it,” consider this instead: be real until you’re thriving. The world doesn’t need another fake version of someone else. It needs the genuine, irreplaceable, authentic you.